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the more beneficial it is to the addressee, the more polite it is. This helps explain
why, for example, imperative mood is not necessarily associated with
impoliteness: Bring me some water vs. Have another drink. Next, optionality scale
is used to rank options according to the degree of choice offered to the addressee -
the degree of politeness matches the degree of indirectness (tentativeness), and,
vice versa, increased directness results in greater impoliteness (e.g., Lend me your
car vs. Do you think you could possibly lend me your car?). It appears that while
imperatives offer little option of whether or not to comply with the action
requested (Give me some change), questions (Have you got a quarter, by any
chance?), hypothetical formulations (Could I borrow some money?), and ones
using negatives (You couldn´t lend me a dollar, could you?) provide greater
freedom to deny that request. Of course, politeness formulae (please) can always
be added to give extra politeness.
We should also differentiate between absolute and relative politeness; in
the absolute sense, Lend me your car is less polite than I hope you don´t mind my
asking, but I wonder if it might be at all possible for you to lend me your car.
However, in some situations, the former request could be overpolite (among family
members) and the latter one impolite (as an ironic remark).
In all societies, maxims of politeness govern linguistic and non-linguistic
behavior. The details of these maxims vary [sometimes greatly] from culture to
culture [and subculture to subculture], leading to situations where
misunderstandings may occur. In middle-class American society, M. Noonan
identifies the following five maxims:
tact
: Minimize cost to other; maximize benefit to other.
modesty
: Minimize praise of self; maximize dispraise of self.
phatic
: Keep talking; avoid silence.
irony
: If you must cause offence, at least do so in a way which doesn’t
overtly conflict with maxims of politeness, but allows the hearer to arrive at the
offensive point of your remark indirectly, by way of implicature [inference].
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